Its 6.41 in the morning. I haven't slept yet. Or more like, I slept for a spurt of 15 mins at about 3, but woke myself back up to finish watching a movie. I am two toothless and its not hurting as much as I thought it would, but the day is still young. Oh, I'm also home, in Calcutta.
And I seem to be convinced suddenly, more than ever that I don't want to keep on doing what I am doing. I need to take some risks, make some preparations and jump into things which actually interest me. Things that I think are cool. Workwise. Somehow, the last year seems to be a bit of a waste, intellectual stimulation wise. But I have a feeling that I will have to hold out a little longer.
There is a battle going on between my wanting to do other things and my crippling self doubt about not having enough skills and not enough talent, aided by the fear that I don't have the talent to develop those skills. But its time again to state to myself here, that I need to shut up and do what feels right and exciting to me.
Because the life inside my head isn't what it used to be.
And I seem to be convinced suddenly, more than ever that I don't want to keep on doing what I am doing. I need to take some risks, make some preparations and jump into things which actually interest me. Things that I think are cool. Workwise. Somehow, the last year seems to be a bit of a waste, intellectual stimulation wise. But I have a feeling that I will have to hold out a little longer.
There is a battle going on between my wanting to do other things and my crippling self doubt about not having enough skills and not enough talent, aided by the fear that I don't have the talent to develop those skills. But its time again to state to myself here, that I need to shut up and do what feels right and exciting to me.
Because the life inside my head isn't what it used to be.
1 comment:
Dekha kor!
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