Stating the Obvious

I think I come here to moan a little, cry a little and then go back and forget this a little.
Maybe its the steroids that I have been taking since april that's the problem. They are supposed to make you depressed. P asked me if I was sad, when I she called me. I just garbled something at her.
I have been garbling a lot lately at people. I've lost the skill for articulate speech. I think I need this time that the brain takes to transfer thought to speech and then the written word to be properly understood.
All these inspirational things that people who are famous on youtube tell me about just taking the risk and just start being famous for something you did, by just doing it. They absorb me when they are talking but soon I have to come back to my one room, and the deep feeling that I can't breathe properly, and I don't have a table to draw on, and I SHOULD move, and the  thought of moving into a new place fills me with a deep sense of foreboding. But I should. I should buy a new computer but that cannot happen because I need to move, and I keep putting it off.